This blog was formerly dedicated in 2009 to my Dad who died of Alzheimer's in 2013. It's been three years now...and I find myself missing blogging...so I am re-inventing my blog... because, after all, life is about moving through, and going forward...

Saturday, October 17, 2009

Dad's hands are swollen and sore again...

Mom went to see Dad yesterday.  Both his hands are sore and swollen again.  The nurses gave him a pillow to rest his hands on.  Mom said he did not make much sense...a lot of random rambling.  Dad never feels full from eating.  He keeps asking, "When is breakfast?" at every meal...

Glad to hear the CNA keeps the channel on Animal Planet, as one of my blogging friends suggested. He also enjoys the baseball games...

Mom said when she came into his room, the curtains were drawn, Dad appeared to be sleeping, and the TV was on.  As soon as she leaned over to kiss him hello, she said it was like someone pushed a button, and off he went, non-stop talking...

It's interestingly odd how each person is so different in how they are with this disease.  At home, these past few years, Dad was very quiet and did not really engage in conversations with us other than pleasantries, polite inquiries when we first come in, and then he would either sit and listen, or fall asleep in his chair, or disappear into the garage or backyard.

Maybe he is thinking something totally different than the jumbled words that come out of his mouth... Maybe he is trying to communicate with us... It is so sad, because I am beginning to feel further and further down the rabbit hole from Dad.  I enjoy hearing his voice, but it is not the same when he rambles on with no regard to what I say, like I am eavesdropping on his and anothers conversation...

Despite my desire to feel close to Dad, it seems like the emotional distance becomes wider and wider...making me feel like almost a stranger.

3 comments:

Argent said...

Your post was very poignant and touching. It must be so hard to find yourself drifting away from someone you clearly love. I actually came over here from A human Kind of Human's blog where you asked about saving your blog and whatnot. Here's the instructions I gave to her.

To save your template do this:

1) View your Blog
2) Go to Customize
3) Go to Edit HTML
There is a Download Full Template link. Click Save when the box appears and browse to a place on your PC's hard drive and save it there.

Now, the content:

1) View your blog (if you have not done so)
2) Go to Customize
3) Choose settings
4) On the Basic tab, there is an "export blog" link. Click this
5) Follow the instructions. A copy of your blog can be saved away to your PC (and can imported from this screen if needed later).

Hope this helped.

Donna B said...

Thank you Argent...now I have to remember what question I asked...was it how to save my entire blog? Is there a way to save it so I can make it into a book?

Argent said...

Hi. Sorry for the delay replying. These instructions will save first your template (so you have a copy in case you mess up customising it) and then your blog content in Atom format. Atom is a bit like XML so your content will be surrounded by the various markup tags that Atom uses. I'm going to experiment with writing a little program toe xtract the raw content. If it works, I'll email you a copy.