This blog was formerly dedicated in 2009 to my Dad who died of Alzheimer's in 2013. It's been three years now...and I find myself missing blogging...so I am re-inventing my blog... because, after all, life is about moving through, and going forward...

Thursday, September 30, 2010

In Memory Of Tony Curtis...

This morning we learned the great Tony Curtis died last night at his home in Henderson. About ten years ago my husband and I had the pleasure of meeting and enjoying the company of Tony and his wife Jill on two occasions.

Tony and his wife frequented the Prime Steak House inside the Bellagio Hotel, where my husband's son works as a bartender.  Tony and he were friends.  Tony invited my son in law, his wife, their children, and us to come to their home in Sun City, which is the bigger 55 and over community near our community.

He greeted us in a pair of crisp white shorts and sandals.  "Hello my darlings!" is what he said as he gave us each a bare chested hug.  He was so down to earth and so hospitable.  He showed us all his art work, which he rarely hangs on the wall.  Instead, he prefers to prop them up against the wall, along the floor, so he can change them around to suit his artistic mood.  He also does shadow boxes and gave us a tour of his studio.

Jill is also very welcoming and kind. Her love of horses, both she and Tony developed the Shiloh Horse Rescue Ranch, taking in abused, unwanted and neglected horses. Their home is unpretentious and unadorned  by what most people would think of a "movie star's home".  He had his movie chair with his name on the back, sitting in front of the panoramic window looking out over the golf course behind his home.  They have one of those infinity pools that look like it just overflows onto the golf course.

He had various pictures of him and other movie stars.  One in particular of him and Jack Lemon, dressed in drag from SOME LIKE IT HOT, sitting on either end of an ornate couch.  When we visited, it was before anyone knew of Jack Lemmon being ill with colon cancer.  He told us before we heard it on the news.

I told him SOME LIKE IT HOT was one of my favorites, along with SPARTACUS, THE VIKINGS, HOUDINI, SWEET SMELL OF SUCCESS, THE DEFIANT ONES and FORTY POUNDS OF TROUBLE.  He was so thrilled I remembered so many of his movies.  He took me by the hand and took me into his bedroom closet and showed me the hat and jacket he wore as the rich Shell Oil Cary Grant talking character in SOME LIKE IT HOT. He told me it still fit him.  He autographed a DVD of a colored version of the movie and gave it to my husband and I.

He showed me the beautiful tile work he supervised in his bathroom shower.  Beautiful turquoise tiles.  He also designed the mosaic in the entry of their home.  We all sat around enjoying his many stories about his life and career. Several of his stories would involve a piece of furniture he had in their home. His tastes were very eclectic.

The second time we saw him was at the Bellagio when we were at the bar visiting my husband's son.  Tony and Jill came in, remembered us coming to visit at their home.  We enjoyed a drink and some conversation before they went into the dining room for dinner.


What a talent.  What a kind, generous, wonderful man he was.  Rest in peace, you are in good company.
Thank you for the memories...

There will be a public memorial service on Monday, October 4, 2010, at 11am.  The news reported the family requests, in lieu of flowers, to please make donations to the Shiloh Horse Rescue.  See Shiloh Horse Rescue for further information.

Tuesday, September 28, 2010

I Am Still Drunk On Baby Jacob's Scent...

Got home Monday afternoon around 2pm.  Izzy was so excited to see me, she jumped at least three feet in the air.  It was miserably hot, but felt so good to return to air conditioning.

Today is my husband's birthday, so I was out running errands and getting his birthday card and gifts as I had no time while in California... We just got in.  He has an early meeting tomorrow morning, so we decided to just go to dinner (Italian of course) and then we stopped by another restaurant where one of my hubby's friends was giving his girlfriend a surprise birthday party.  Her birthday is the same as my husbands, plus they are both from Buffalo, New York!

We had planned on going to the movies to see WALL STREET...but since he has the early meeting, we will go tomorrow or Thursday.

He leaves for annual Mexico trip Saturday afternoon, and my sister arrives Saturday morning for the week he will be gone!!  I am so excited I cannot concentrate.  WE ARE GOING TO HAVE SO MUCH FUN!!

I have more errands to run tomorrow.  My left wedding band ring finger and the middle finger next to it are still sore...they just ache.  I am going to try rubbing DEEP HEAT on them... 

Izzy was so good last night...when it was bedtime, she followed me into our room, and she walked right into her crate.  She feels lighter...I think she lost weight...  This was the longest I have ever boarded her.

Since being in California, my sleep pattern is all goofed up.  I fall asleep between 8pm and 9pm, waking up at 5:30am.  My eyes are flapping right now and I cannot wait to hit the sheets.

Sorry this post is so boring...I am still drunk on baby Jacob's scent...

Sunday, September 26, 2010

Who Turned Up The Heat???

I am so hot I cannot pay attention... it is absolutely ROASTING and the humidity is kicking my boo-tay!!  Mom has no air conditioning.  I don't know HOW she stands it...

We went to visit Dad again, and had a super visit, but I have zero energy to write.  I will have to wait until after I drive back home tomorrow to write...I cannot even think straight, because I feel like someone stuffed me in an oven!  And the weather report says it will be even HOTTER tomorrow!!

Friday, September 24, 2010

Can Anybody Tell Me What Day It Is?

Up early to help my eight year old grandson spike up his hair for school.  I saved him from getting a buzz cut from his Mom last night.  The younger one got buzzed.  Lots of snuggles, kisses and hugs...

Drove from Beaumont to West Covina to see Dad.  Found him sitting near the window in the lunch room.  He was sitting in his wheel chair, swaying and bobbing his head to the music playing over head from  the speakers.  I could see he had a huge smile on his face and his eyes were closed.  I walked around, getting directly in front of him and just stood for a few minutes, enjoying watching him.  I tapped him on the shoulder and when he opened his eyes I was swaying and bobbing my head too.  He began to laugh,  "DONNA! You came!  You're here!  Oh!  You're dancing with me too!!"

I leaned in to kiss and hug him.  I told him it was so good to see him so happy. "I'm getting married very soon to my lovely lady... let's go outside and I will tell you about it.."  Dad fancies many of the lady staff and believes they love him as much as he loves them... he is always flirting and marrying someone.

As usual, as soon as we were outside, he forgot that subject and was moving on to another.  We sat at a table with another lady.  She began coughing loudly, and Dad explained she had Asthma.  I asked the woman if she would like a drink of water, which she politely accepted.  I returned with her water and she acted like I had just given her fresh, mountain spring water, thanking me profusely...




I had brought my camera to show Dad the pictures from the past few days.  Dad was mesmerized and enjoyed all the pictures I showed him.

The woman who was coughing needed help going back inside, so I helped her get her wheel chair over the door jam and returned to Dad...

Another patient wheeled outside and sat a couple tables over.  She would sporadically shout and yell.  She made loud noises, no actual words really.  Dad smiled at her and told me he loved her because she always spoke her mind.  "I tell her to let 'er rip, and get it off her chest.  God Bless her!"  I marveled at Dad's positive attitude, because there was a time when he would have been embarrassed with her outbursts...

As I listened to Dad bounce from topic to topic, from the vicious way the Japanese fought in the war to the sweet young women who run from the other end of the hallways to come help him. As I would open my mouth to comment or say some thing, he would keep on talking like he was on a time limit to speak...

The woman with the loud outbursts would also stomp her feet, and since I had my back to her, facing Dad, as he faced her, I would instinctively turn around to look, because she sounded like she was charging us.  Dad was preoccupied with her and would stop and start his conversations to comment or smile to her.  His compliments to her sailed away on the breeze, for she never responded to him.  She was in her own world.

There was another gentlemen sitting right by the door from the patio to the lunch room.  He kept calling to Dad, calling him Papa... when I would help one of the ladies get back inside, he would thrust his worn photo album at me and point to his son, his daughter, his nephews, his grand daughters.... I told him the boys were as handsome as him and the girls were all beautiful, which they were.  He has a very wonderful family.

The CNA brought Dad's lunch tray outside and set it in front of him.  Dad told her, he would rather eat inside with his friends.  She carried his tray back inside and I following, pushing Dad's wheel chair inside.  She set his tray down at the table by the door with the friendly gentleman, who greeted us both happily.

The room was pretty full and Dad and the gentleman were sitting at a table for two.  The gentleman held up a magazine with pictures of women dressed in evening gowns.  "Which one would you pick to go out?", he asked me.  I pointed to a strapless floor length back dress.  He looked up and smiled, "SEXY".

Dad smacked his lips as his hands hovered over his tray with cheeseburger, fries, pudding, coffee, milk, juice, water, roll and cake.  "I'll make this food disappear real quick!"  I laughed out loud... I wanted to sit down and visit longer, but sitting by the door, there was not any room for another chair.

I hugged Dad and told him I would let him enjoy his lunch with his friend, and I would see him later on. I will try visiting earlier on Sunday... He told me he loved me and to enjoy my lunch, as he bit into the cheeseburger, taking almost half of it in his mouth!

I stopped at the nursing station to chat with the nurses, updating myself on how Dad has been doing on his therapy and some upcoming events.

On my way back to Mom's, I called to see if she wanted me to pick her up some lunch.  All she wanted was a Frappe from Mc Donalds.  When I arrived, the termite guy was preparing to crawl under the house to finish his inspection.  He is a friend of the family.  He used to be married to the neighbor's daughter.  Very nice man.  He gave Mom an incredible quote to treat all the hot spots and even to repaint her patio cover.

We sat and talked as the floor fan sprayed cool air, which felt so good on such a warm day. My sister stopped in after she got off work and we all went out to dinner.

My daughter had called to ask if I would come to visit tomorrow.  I will get up early tomorrow to walk and meet my sister and girlfriend in Claremont.  I won't stay as long as I normally do, so I can leave about 9:30 am to drive down to Lake Elsinore.  It will be my first time seeing their home.  My daughter told me my oldest daughter and two grand sons are also coming to visit.  Should be another fun filled day.

I am beginning to feel I live in my car...

Thursday, September 23, 2010

More Pictures And Updates....

I tell you, I am EXHAUSTED!  I took a three hour nap today, and I am struggling to keep my eyes open to write this!

Yesterday, I spent the day at the hospital with my daughter Jodee and baby Jacob.  Jacob's Daddy had to go to work, so he relieved me at 5pm.  I drove straight to Yucaipa to meet with my girlfriend to see her new apartment, then afterward, we went out to dinner.

I have slow growing cataracts, so night driving is a challenge.  My new glasses have really helped to where I felt brave enough to make plans at night... but, some time between my last trip to Nevada in June and last month, my right eye was getting red in the outer corner of my eye.  Eye drops made it worse, so I made an appointment with the eye doctor.  Apparently, I have something "like" arthritis of the eye.  The doctor gave me some steroidal drops, which did help.  Lately, it has been flaring up again.  Now, I am concerned I may have been over doing it.  At any rate, when I return home, I plan on talking to my eye doctor to pin her down for some further explanation.

Also, I woke up Tuesday morning and my wedding ringer finger was painful and swollen.  I could not remove my wedding ring.  Most of the day I was miserable and by the evening, I was soaking my hand in ice water.  Normally, Windex works best for removing jewelry, but my daughter did not have any. She uses "green" products.  We went searching in the garage to see if her husband had anything, and found some heavy duty foam window cleaner.  My daughter sprayed it on my finger as I twisted my ring.  It hurt like hell, but I finally muscled it off.  My finger feels like someone stomped on it... it really is still sore, but the swelling has gone down.

Driving home Monday night after Jodee's delivery and then last night, tell me driving at night is NOT a good idea!  My eyes were all blurry and I experienced pain in my eyes from the bright lights.  I am hoping it was due to me being so tired, and not the condition of my eyes...

As promised, here are more pics of Jacob and of my daughter Jodee...


Mama Jodee and Jacob


                                                                 Sleepy little Jacob


Such a precious boy....


Proud Grandma with Jacob

Jodee called around 8:00 pm.  She was just released from the hospital!  She was suppose to be released right after lunch!  I plan on going over to their home to help out, but she told me she will call me and let me know when she is ready...

I also need to visit my Dad and help Mom with cleaning out Dad's desk stuff.  I have been staying with my older daughter Holly in Beaumont, so tomorrow I will head out to Covina, to stay with Mom.  Unless Jodee needs me to stay longer, I plan on returning home on Monday.

Tomorrow I will visit Dad in the morning, and if Jodee does not need me during the day, will help Mom at her house, then my sister, her husband, Mom and I will go to  dinner.

Tuesday, September 21, 2010

He Has Arrived...



Introducing Jacob, 8 lbs even, 21.5 inches long, born 3:48 pm by emergency c-section, September 20, 2010.  Check out those huge hands and long fingers!! Eyes open and focused.  He is so alert!  Very serious though... obviously, extremely intelligent!


Such a good baby...so far, sleeping, eating, and fussing only a tiny, tiny bit.  He loves to breast feed and has already gained two ounces!


Proud Daddy with his son.

My daughter needs to sleep today and rest.  She is exhausted! She asked me to come tomorrow from 9 am to 4 pm to stay with her and the baby, so Daddy can go home to do some work.

Promise to post pics of Mama and Jacob tomorrow...

Going to spend today with my other two grand sons... in fact, gotta go... they have finished their home work and are beckoning me to play!!

So happy... and so emotionally exhausted!

Monday, September 20, 2010

GOT THE CALL AT 4:03 AM!!!!!!

It is 7am and I am getting ready to load the car and take Izzy to the Vet for boarding, then on my way to CALI...need to talk to my oldest daughter, as she is who I will stay with while my youngest daughter is in the hospital, then will stay with my Mom when my daughter goes back home...

I am SO EXCITED and have major nervous stomach for my baby, who is having her first baby!!

More later...love you guys!!!

Saturday, September 18, 2010

I Gotta Whittle Down My Middle...

Still no grand baby...my daughter is home and dilated to one.

Betty over at A Corgi in Southern California, blogged about weight loss and her plan to lose it. She got me motivated to confess too.  Since we have moved to Nevada, almost four years now, I have become the most sedentary I have ever been. 

I can't really blame blogging, because I have only been doing it for a year and a half...but I have been on the computer emailing and playing games more than I ever have.  I have packed on a good twenty pounds since moving here.  Course, the buffets and incredibly delicious restaurants near by don't help either. My body type must be an Apple.  I have bird legs and a big bulge around my middle. It squeezes northerly to my upper arms, which look like flying squirrel wings.  My lower chin hangs down past my neck like a turkey and my cheeks look like I am storing nuts for the winter.

My husband works a ton of hours so when he gets home, he pretty much eats dinner and zones out.  We have our date night once a week, and despite him yawning, he does his best to be good company.  We have gotten in a rut when we go out.  We used to get a good share of out of town company, which kept us busy and "on the go"... Once a month we used to meet with friends for dinner and conversation or play cards.  We used to go to the occasional show at one of the Hotel/Casinos. Every now and then, we would pop over to one of his two sons and visit with their families. We used to take Izzy and go walk around the District or Town Square, which are out door, dog friendly malls. We used to go to concerts every now and then...Now, most of the time, go out to dinner, see a movie and play a little Keno afterward.

I would rather do something new, something more fun....like dancing. Every time my husband asks, "What do you feel like doing tonight?" , I say, "Let's go dancing".  He laughs, and we go do the same ol' thing. I know he is stressed from his work and desperately needs to retire... Maybe after he retires, he will dance with me again.  We used to dance all the time when we were dating.  I guess when the ring goes on the finger, the dancing shoes go as far back in the closet as he can hide them!

I have started dancing alone at home to loud music for about an hour.  I am huffing and puffing turning fire engine red and have to take a shower to cool down.  Izzy thinks I am playing with her and jumps around with me or attacks my feet.

I want to get a Hula Hoop.  The one I bought is a cheapo from Wal-Mart. Its hot pink and lights up. I can't keep it going, and I am getting bruises up and down my legs.  I need the heavy one with the weights in it.  I used to be an excellent "hooper" and would win contests.  I desperately need to whittle down my middle... Everything I read says the bigger your waist, the bigger chance of  a heart attack.

We have a state of the art gym up at our Rec Center which is free for everyone in our community.  It has an indoor pool and all kinds of equipment.  Of course, I don't use it.  I tried.  But, other people's sweat grosses me out...even when there are signs all over to wipe the machines down...I don't care.  It's probably an excuse.  I never have liked exercise or gyms, let's be honest.

I used to be so skinny most of my life.  I could eat whatever I wanted and had to drink those meals in a can along with my meals to GAIN weight.  No chance those days are coming back...

So what am I going to do about it?  I don't know yet, but admitting I have a problem is the first step...right?

Friday, September 17, 2010

Working On The Hollywood Sign and Visiting Taj Mahal...

Mom went to visit Dad this morning.  She found him in bed.  Doctor-Doctor told her she had just finished showering,and shaving him and he seemed kind of tired.  Mom said he acted like he wanted to nap...that is until the girls brought in some home made burritos and some grape juice to drink...Dad thought his was coffee and complained it was cold (he HATES cold coffee).  Mom reminded him it was grape juice and it was suppose to be cold.  The girls gave Mom one and Dad two...

Another  two girls came in and asked Dad if he would like to go walking after lunch.  Dad was enthusiastic and was joking and flirting with them.  He cooed at the girls and told them how loving and caring they are and how much he loves them all.

Dad told Mom he was working with his nephew on the Hollywood Sign...(his nephew lives below it), and how impressed he was with the President.  He told Mom how important it was to have World Peace and for everyone to be friends...


Dad's new window is gorgeous, and he really enjoys having his bed by the window so he can watch people coming and going.  He loves to see the trees, nature and what type of a day it is outside.  He told Mom how much he loves it there and how everyone takes such good care of him.

One of Dad's good friends, who was a Chaplain with Dad, stopped by to see him.  He told Mom he would report back to the other Chaplains to let them know how Dad was doing.  He told Dad one of the other Chaplains was on vacation in Hawaii.  Dad told him the gentleman in Hawaii and he had recently visited the Taj Mahal...



Dad's friend just looked at Mom and they both nodded their heads and just listened to Dad ramble on...I, myself, enjoy when Dad takes his mini vacations in his imagination....

Dad's friend told Mom he would like to come to Dad's 90th birthday party.  The nursing home is planning a big shindig for Dad's birthday. He was so impressed at how well Dad looks...

The skin care nurse called me today to let me know the wound on his pinkie toe is very small and almost healed.  His cut toe from the wacko podiatrist is almost healed. 

Thursday, September 16, 2010

Crackers In The Fridge And Milk In The Pantry...

My mind is a ball of fluff...concentration eludes me.
Our home is getting an intense cleaning.
Mindless business to keep myself occupied.
I put crackers in the fridge and milk in the pantry.
I rinsed out Izzy's water dish, only to put it back on the floor....empty.

Wednesday, September 15, 2010

Dreaming Of Babies and Waiting for Survivor...

Still no grandson...my daughter is "more than ready".  I am dreaming of holding the little guy...keeping myself busy cleaning.  Am already packed. Having trouble concentrating...  Worked in the yard today and had a service trim our trees so they don't break in our winter winds...waiting for Survivor to start...will let everyone know...as soon as I get THE CALL....

Sunday, September 12, 2010

Lots Of Ladies And More Menudo Please....


 My sister went to see Dad this morning. She found him patiently waiting in his wheel chair, in the rec room, for the church service.  She wheeled him out on the patio to enjoy the Starbucks coffee and pumpkin bread she had  brought him. He ate about 1/2 the bread and a few sips of the coffee. It was a beautiful day and several of the staff girls were out there chopping onions and cilantro, preparing Menudo. It smelled really good....

She wheeled Dad around and then sat on a bench with Dad facing her. She was not sure what medication he is on, but he spoke VERY LITTLE crazy talk. He seemed "normal"...just like he used to be at home... He told her he preferred the sun on his face, even if he got a sunburn.  She moved him so he could be more in the sun, which made him give her a huge smile.

They talked about what a beautiful day it was.  Dad looked up at the tall palm trees off in the distance, admiring them with their beautiful fronds.  He told her he remembered the palm trees on the island when he was in the War.  He told her how the bombing made the palms tall, ugly stalks, all charred and burnt, stripped of their fronds.

 Dad mentioned several times to her, he is getting forgetful with names.  He would start to tell her something about someone but he couldn't remember their name. She showed him pictures of my daughters and told him my youngest daughter would be having her baby soon.  Dad told her he already knew.  She told him of her daughter being in New York; he knew that too...

She told him how much I loved him and he said he knew. He told her how persistent I am in calling so I can speak with him. He couldn't remember my husband's name, but as she started to say his name, he thanked her and said his name.

He told how he remembered her setting goals and achieving them.  He remembered she tried out for cheerleader three times before she finally made varsity, her senior year.  She was speechless and the fact he could remember, meant so much.  He complimented her for sticking to what she wants and going for it.

She reminded him of some things he did for her when she had strep throat. When she was small, she could not take Penicillin. She can now, but back then, it made her sick. Dad came home late from work and brought her a black vinyl Barbie wallet.  It was red plastic inside with a coin holder (the kind you slide coins into) with a comb and a nail file.  She LOVED that wallet!  She was convinced his gift made her feel better.

She told him how much we all love him. He told her he loves his family too. He commented on how the nursing staff take such good care of him. He seemed very happy and content.

She couldn't see much of his feet. I had asked her to check out his cut toe from the clumsy Podiatrist... He had his compression stockings on and foam booties. She did notice a Band aid on his middle toe. His right eye looked bad again. It looked very sore, but didn't seem to bother him. He also has the barnacle on his ear again. She was happy to see he had his alarm bracelet on.

My sister always gives Dad a massage on his shoulders, arms, hands, and legs when she visits.  Dad loves it and told her how good it felt.  He told her how loud his room mate snores...she smiled and remembered HOW LOUD he snores...

The sun was making Dad sleepy.  He told her how guilty he feels when he takes a nap in his wheel chair.  She told him not to worry and to take a nap whenever he felt like one.  He talked of working out in the yard and garden, when he lived home with Mom.  He told her often he worked so hard, he had to go indoors to take a nap.

She saw Doctor-Doctor, but there were so many of the gals helping to make the Menudo, she looked up from her chopping and waved.  Dad was distracted with all "his wives and girlfriends", no doubt he felt as if he were in a Smorgasbord.  He appeared to adore them all.  She enjoyed seeing him so animated and happy, instead of paranoid and depressed.  She felt he seemed really happy and took the picture above to prove it.
 
She watched him and listened to his "enjoyment sounds" as Doctor-Doctor brought him a bowl of Menudo. He relished the spicy broth, smacking his lips...  She hoped and prayed, he would not be sorry, later.....

Saturday, September 11, 2010

Remembering....



I don't think I will ever forget the image of that morning, nine years ago today... I had just turned off the alarm on my clock radio.  Instead of the channel playing Oldies But Goodies, it was the stressed voice of the DJ telling of reports a plane had crashed into one of the twin towers...

I ran to turn on the TV, to see the image above... the second plane coming for the south tower.

Disbelief, unspeakable shock, horror, intense sadness, tears clouding my eyes at the realization of thousands of lives working in those two towers...

Numbly going through the motions of getting myself ready to go to my job as an intake clerk at the federal bankruptcy court in Riverside, California... Only to walk up the steps to see my co-workers and federal marshals, consoling one another and crying.  There would be no work today.  The federal building was closed.

Back at home, I watched and cried. The sadness I felt on so many levels.  Surely, we would go to war...the families...oh, the families...the fireman and police...New York...more disbelief...yet, feeling our world would never be the same ever again...

We fly the flag and we remember and honor all who perished that day, nine years ago today, September 11, 2001.

Friday, September 10, 2010

Poor Dad Was Clipped A Little Too Close...And A Movie Review...

The Podiatrist came today and did Dad's nails.  The nursing home called me to let me know the Podiatrist had trimmed one nail too short and cut his toe!  The wound care nurse was concerned due to his circulation issues.  She left word with his Physician to look at the toe and assured me they would monitor his recovery.  She said Dad was upset and very uncomfortable. 

Dad will probably not want the Podiatrist to cut his toenails in the future.  Now I see why Dad was not more anxious to get them done.  A few other red flags have occurred that gave me pause with this guy, I think I will call the Administrator on Monday and see if there is another Podiatrist they can use...


My daughter and I enjoyed our "date" today.  We each sent pictures via our cell phones of one another being excited.  She told me she would keep my picture as her wallpaper of her phone...

Her movie started an hour earlier than mine, but we spoke afterward.  She had to eat, because she was so hungry.  When I was eating, she was home and ready to take a nap.

We both had weird reactions to the movie.  Elizabeth Gilbert wrote Eat Pray Love in more plentiful times.  I think my reaction was in part, due to our current economic times when so many are struggling financially.  It seemed abundantly self indulgent and extravagant.  I wasn't moved. Maybe it was Julia Roberts. I remember seeing an interview with the author on Oprah, and I liked Liz Gilbert...I don't know, it lost my interest, kind of like the book.  I stopped reading a good way into India.

She wanted balance, but it seemed her balance meant finding a man she could feel balanced with. I think when we each find someone with the right chemistry, physical, emotional and spiritual compatibilities, we feel like we have found nirvana.  Although there were some meaningful and good deeds done, I had a difficult time staying awake.  It fell flat for me, and I would say wait for the rental...

Thursday, September 9, 2010

Dad's Painting Of The Titanic, Water Heaters And Other Excitement...

Mom went to visit Dad today.  She wheeled Dad to the alcove, a visiting area off the south wing, close to Dad's room. Dad was mesmerized by a painting of water with a reflection, on the wall of the alcove.  Dad told Mom, if she looked closely, she could see his signature on the painting he did.  Mom complimented him.  He told her it was "when we hit the iceberg and so many drown".  Mom asked if he meant the Titanic.  Dad smiled and said, "That's right."...

Mom just nodded her head.  Dad began talking about his son K_____ coming to visit and how he spoke to everyone to help them with their businesses.  (My brother owns a trucking company.)  Mom said he rambled on quite a while on my brother...saying Dad did not make much sense...

Dad told Mom he had not seen any of his grand children in a long time and how much he missed them.  Mom told him they were all back in school.  "Oh", was Dad's only reply...

Mom asked if he would like to go outside on the patio and Dad was very enthusiastic.  The nursing home was "over run" with nursing students, and all very nice.  Dad loves the ladies and really enjoys flirting, so when Mom tried to suggest they go sit in the far side of patio where there was more shade, Dad insisted on staying closer to the ladies and having the sun on his face...

A nice woman sat on the bench near them, so they all engaged in conversation. Mom said she was quite pleasant and was not sure if she was a resident or not...

After a while, Mom took Dad back inside to his room.  Mom had brought him a National Geographic, which Dad has subscribed to for years.  When Mom checked in at the nursing station, the social worker reminded Mom about Dad's new glasses, so Mom pulled them from his drawer so Dad could read.  She put the old ones in her purse to take home for a future spare.  Dad complained he could not see out of them.  I think he forgot how to look through bifocals, he has been without his glasses for so long.  Mom showed him how to use the bifocals and Dad read aloud from the magazine to Mom.

She brought out his Bible with larger print, and Dad was very excited to read his Bible.  Mom gave him some Memento candies, one of Dad's favorites, which delighted him immensely.  He loves the way the mints make his mouth feel so fresh.  Mom had also brought a new bottle of Aveeno lotion with Dad's name on it for the skin care Angel to use on Dad. She left it for her at the nursing station. His skin looks better today, then it has the majority of his life, thanks to her.

Several of the staff, Doctor-Doctor, and the nice male CNA who accompanied Dad to the vascular surgeon, came to Dad's room to chat with Mom and Dad.

The nursing home is having new windows installed and they were working in Dad's room, so Mom wheeled him to the dining room for lunch.  They sat at his usual table with the salty sailor and his girlfriend.  Mom said the girlfriend does not have any teeth and usually chokes every time Mom has been there.  Today was no different, as she choked on her food again.  Maybe she is trying to eat as fast as her boyfriend!

Dad gobbled up a tasty smelling beef enchilada with sour cream and salsa, green beans, Spanish rice, fruit cocktail and strawberry ice cream.  They also gave him a can of Ensure, with he gulped down along with  milk, coffee and water.

After Dad gorged himself, he usually gets sleepy.  Doctor-Doctor came in and told Mom she would keep Dad company until they finished installing his new window.  She assured Mom they were almost done.  She would take him back and get him cozy for a nap. Mom kissed Dad good bye and left him in the capable hands of his Doctor-Doctor...

On her way out, one of the office ladies came up to Mom asking if she got the letter from Medi-Cal.  Mom had not received anything and inquired what she was talking about.  She told Mom it was the paperwork she marked to receive Medi-Cal too.  Mom told her she never applied for Medi-Cal and had her own insurance and did not want it.  She found out the woman in the office she always spoke with and who kept all Dad's things in order has left and no longer works there....

Once home, Mom attempted to call Dad's Social Worker at Medi-Cal.  She had to leave a message.  Mom called me and I could hear the stress in her voice.  She hates paperwork...I may have to call her and find out what it is all about...

                                         **********************************

UPDATE ON WATER HEATER:  I called American Water Heater this morning telling about having to have the plumber (step-son) come back today and how the conversion kit did not work.  He asked me if the plumber had removed the "orifice" from the old part and installed it on the new part.  WHAT?  HOW RINKY-DINK is that??? 

He went into some explanation about following the instructions, #7. I asked why they did not include that piece in the conversion kit with everything else?  What if I had thrown it away or it was damaged?  I told them it was really poor customer service.  He went into the various desert and mountain altitudes and making sure to have the correct size, blah, blah, blah. 

We had thrown the old part in the trash, so I had to retrieve it, but could not find the instructions.  I wrote down what he told me.  He further explained, without the orifice, the gas line would allow too much gas and it would get too hot and the sensor would turn off the pilot light.  This information made sense because yesterday, when my step son (the plumber) turned on the water heater, flames shot out the sides of the water heater.

Just to be on the safe side, I called Sears to schedule a service call on our warranty we just took out recently on our washer, dryer, refrigerator and added the water heater.  Luckily, after my explanation of no hot water for today being the sixth day, she said she would send someone out between 8am and noon.  THANK YOU LORD! (Just in case we would have to replace it...)

My son arrived at 8:30am.  He had it finished and the water was "warm" by 9:15am.  The Sears man called and was on his way.  While my son was waiting, he shimmed our toilets.  After the Sears man arrived they both talked and assessed the situation.  By this time, our water was HOT!!  WHOOOO-HOOO!!!  Everything seemed to be fine, so they left. 

I took Izzy for a walk.  I was suppose to take my car in for an oil change and over all check up of brakes and tires to be ready for my upcoming California trip when I get THE CALL,  from my pregnant, younger daughter.  It was gorgeous outside, a lot cooler with hardly any wind.  I decided I better finish painting our four big planter pots, which are badly weathered and starting to lose paint.

I prepped all four pots, trimmed the spiky Desert Spoon plants in the pots, and spray painted all four pots with a good first coat.  Menopause makes a woman's temperature gauge hyper sensitive and mine could have boiled water faster than our water heater!  My face was as red as a fire engine, and I had to take three water breaks and wet my hair and face down to cool off.

I finished about 12:15pm and went inside to take a nice shower.  The water so was so HOT, I actually (LOL) had to turn it down, to take a cooler shower.  It felt so good!  Way better than a sponge bath with cold water!!!

After my eye appointment, my face had returned to normal color, and I was off to get my car done.  I only needed to rotate my tires and get a new engine filter.  I have life time free oil changes.

Driving home, I could hardly keep my eyes open.  As soon as I hit the door, I did a swan dive onto the couch and slept until 6pm.  My youngest daughter and I plan to go to see EAT PRAY LOVE tomorrow together...and out to lunch at Panera Bread....only, she will go in California and I will be going in Nevada.  We talk on the phone before and after the movie.

I started to prepare dinner and my husband came home, kissed me, gave Izzy a treat and went to the garage for a soda.  He yelled to me to come to the garage.  As I walked into the laundry room, I could smell gas.
My husband was cranky!  He calls his son and tells him about the gas.. I open the garage door to vent the garage and get on the land line to call the gas company...

The Gas Company emergency after hours person, tells me to not smoke, cook (too late), open the garage door (too late), turn on any appliances or lights (too late), to wait outside and they will have someone there ASAP!

My husband is sitting at the table eating his dinner.  I tell him we are suppose to wait outside.  He informs me he is NOT MOVING.  He is going to finish his dinner!  I ask what our son said, and my husband explained "I" should take a spray bottle with soap in it and spray it in front of the water heater and if it bubbles, we have a gas leak.  His son thinks the pilot light went out again and thinks we should call Sears and get a new water heater...

I can't eat.  I think we should go outside.  My husband said, "if it was gonna blow, it would have done it already", and puts a fork full of chicken in his mouth...as you can see, my husband does not let too much excite him.

I on the other hand, am opening the back door, closing the front door and the double doors to the laundry room leading to the garage (which is a fire door).  Just about then, I hear a truck pull up, and it is the gas man.  While he takes a reading of potential gas leaks from the street, I feel him in on the past few days...

He advices me to finish my dinner and he goes into the garage.  Apparently, two nut valves for the gas sensor and the pilot light were loose.  The pilot light was still on.  He tightened them up and told us we should not have any further problems.  He also advised us to unplug our circulation pump for the water heater to make the gas hot on demand.  He said we might have to wait a minute and we would have hot water and it would save us considerably on the gas bill.

So far, so good, on the water heater. We are fine.  My hands are sore from trimming the plants and spray painting.  My left arm is sore from the T-Dap (Tetanus, Diphtheria and Whooping Cough) vaccine I had yesterday so I can see my grandson.  My daughter had told me there is a whooping cough outbreak in California, so she, her boyfriend and the new baby will all have the shot.  I am not taking any chances of missing holding my grandson!!!

I am going to enjoy another nice, long, hot shower and hit the sheets as I am looking forward to my day with my daughter tomorrow. I've had enough excitement for one day...

Wednesday, September 8, 2010

Talk About A Cold Shower...



SAY NO!, TO AMERICAN WATER HEATERS!!!

Our American water heater will be five years old this coming November.  We have lived in our home four years. Our thermocouple went out Saturday, and we have been living with NO HOT WATER for, five days now.

Coincidentally, I just happened to spot an article in our monthly community magazine about some homes having faulty water heaters.  I called the toll free phone number and low and behold, we are one of the ones with a faulty thermocouple.  The rep said he would send us a "conversion kit", but we would have to have a plumber install it. He also told me, due to the holiday, he could not mail it out until Tuesday, so it would arrive today, Wednesday. My husband's son is a plumber, so I called him and asked if he would be available on Wednesday when the conversion kit would arrive and he told me he would.

Two kits arrived today around 11am.  I called our son, he came over around noon and began work on the water heater.  I fixed us both lunch and he finished a little before 2pm.  I tested the water before leaving to run my errands, and the water was warming up...my step son had told me it would take a couple of hours...

I was gone most of the day, helping my friend pack.  She is moving to Santa Barbara. My husband and I  usually have a "date night" on Wednesday, so when I got home, we left for our date.  We got home at 10pm and I could not wait to take a nice hot shower...

You guessed it...the water was barely luke warm!!!  I AM SICK OF FRENCH BATHS!!!  Why couldn't it have gone out about two weeks ago, when the weather was in the triple digits and I wouldn't mind taking a cold shower?? Noooooooooo!

So now, I think I know why they sent two kits!!  I went online tonight and EVERYONE is complaining about AMERICAN WATER HEATERS...we are all having the same problems.  I will call our son to come out again tomorrow morning and install the other one.  IF that one is faulty, I will be filing a complaint with the Better Business Bureau and the Federal Consumer Agency.... WHAT A PAIN!!!

I have had errands or doctor appointments (I do all my physicals etc in September) all this week, because next week my daughter is due to have her baby.  I plan on packing this weekend and having my suitcases all ready.  Tomorrow I have one more eye doctor appointment and I am taking my car in to get checked out for the trip...I can't just sit around and test the water to make sure it is working!!!

Just a warning to everyone...DON'T GET AMERICAN WATER HEATERS!!!!!!  The rep also suggested to go to Lowe's, as they sell the conversion kits.  I should have realized, when our son checked, he was told they carry the A, B and C kits, but NO D kits (which is the one we need) and Lowe's has not carried them in some time...HELLO?!  They don't carry them, because they DON'T WORK!!!

I will be calling this company tomorrow and letting them know what they can do with their water heaters!!!


Tuesday, September 7, 2010

How My Father Prevented My Life Of Crime...

When I was about sixteen, five of my girlfriends and I went shopping at White Front (which was a discount chain store, similar to K-Mart or Wal Mart of today) to buy some last minute accessories, as we were planning on going to a dance at the local Teen Canteen...

The girls I was with, were girlfriends my Mother did not approve of, and did not like me associating with them.  I was going to tell Mom I was spending the night with one of them, and then we would tell her Mom we had permission, and my girlfriend and I would be driven to the dance by her older sister and her girlfriend.

Dad rarely said anything derogatory about my friends, but for the most part, would back up Mom's decisions, as she was pretty much the disciplinarian.

I wanted to buy a head band, but if I did, I would not have enough money to pay my way in to the dance.  I asked my girlfriend if she had any extra money she could lend me.  Another of my friends over heard our conversation, and suggested we each steal some thing.  She told us she does it all the time, and gave us tips on how to do it.

I had never stolen anything, except a piece of hard candy from a grocery store bin.  When my Dad discovered I had taken the candy, he marched me back to the store and made me confess to the store manager.  The candy was only a penny, but Dad insisted on paying it, despite the manager telling him it was all right.  Dad made me pay him back out of my piggy bank.

I was very nervous, and have never been a good liar.  I had become Catholic at age 7, so guilt and I were well acquainted...

Everyone had selected what they were going to take and broke into pairs.  I was certain I had red neon letters flashing on and off on my forehead....letters that spelled, "This girl is stealing a headband".  I was so afraid, nervous, and my gut was SCREAMING at me to put my hair in a pony tail and forget the head band...

Everyone had left the store, and were waiting for me in the parking lot.  I decided to ignore my gut, because that head band would look so "bitchen" with my flip hair do...much better than a pony tail, which would make me look like Dumbo, with my big ears sticking out...

As I passed the front doors, feeling safe, I began to run toward my girlfriends who were already in the car.  I could see two of them kneeling on the back seat staring at me.  I began to feel nervous like they might leave me.  Just then, I felt a strong hand grab my arm and before I could turn around, I saw my girlfriends drive off in the car.

My heart was pounding.  I knew I had been caught.  The store detective looked down at me and asked to look in my purse.  I opened it up and knew it had to have been the neon sign on my forehead...

He took the head band and ushered me into a back room of the store.  He asked for my parent's phone number.  There was a woman and another man also in the room, sitting at a table. He called and I heard him say my Dad's name. He spoke in a hushed voice.  The detective hung up the phone and turned to tell me, "Your Father is on his way".

When Dad arrived, his face tense and pale, wearing sweat pants with a soiled tee shirt, something he would NEVER do normally.  He would dress up just to go to the grocery store.  I immediately started crying.  I will never forget the look on Dad's face.  He asked for the detective and then rushed toward the detective and thrust out his hand.  Dad pumped his hand in profuse gratitude, thanking him for not calling the police.

Dad assured the detective, I would be given appropriate punishment.  I felt like dirt under a doormat.  Dad lead me out of the room, not saying a word.  When we reached the parking lot, I noticed all the seats from the VW had been removed except for the driver's seat.  Dad had literally been in the midst of cleaning out the car. 

I climbed inside and sat on the floor of the car. Dad would not even look at me.  We drove the short distance back home, but it felt like the drive was much longer than it was in reality.  Dad pulled in the driveway, the car seats, canister vacuum, rags, and a bucket were all sitting in the driveway.  I followed him into the house and my mother stood in the kitchen doorway with her hands on her hips. She looked very angry.

I followed Dad into their bedroom, and he closed the bedroom door.  I sat on their bed and Dad stood at the door for a few minutes, his back to me.  I sniffed and apologized, promising I would NEVER do it again...Dad turned and looked at me.  I could not look at him, and looked down at my tear stained Capri's.

"Donna, I am very disappointed in you!" was all Dad had to say.  I would have rather have him beat me with a chair leg.  I could not feel lower or more rotten if he had picked me up on a street corner soliciting...I sobbed hysterically.

I don't remember how long I was restricted to my yard, or what punishment I received, obviously I did not go to the dance... All I remember is how much I had disappointed my Father, and it had a huge impact on me.  That day, I knew I would never do anything to make my Father feel that way ever again.  I knew a life of crime was NOT for me.

Monday, September 6, 2010

Saturday, September 4, 2010

When You Make Your Move, It Has To Be Like Dancing...

"The essence of football was blocking, tackling, and execution
based on timing, rhythm and deception."



~Knute Rockne~


I spoke with Dad today. I only had to call three times.  I had asked one of  nurses to call me when he finished his lunch, but she forgot... He sounded happy and in a great mood. He had finished lunch and was in his room with Doctor-Doctor.  She had just given him his shower and was preparing to tuck him in for his nap.  He was watching TV, the story of Knute Rockne.

Dad likes football.  He told me how "it is all about rhythm...When you make your move, it has to be like dancing..."   I had the feeling he was not just talking about football...



We do have to learn the plays of life...we do have to develop a rhythm. The more nimble we are to dance through the twists and turns life throws in our path, the stronger and more adaptable we become...

As always when Doctor-Doctor is around, I hear the joy in Dad's voice.  He also refers to her as his wife, and spoke of the rhythm between a man and a woman...  "When a woman looks a man in the eye, it is a mating call..."

Dad is definitely feeling frisky and wide awake...

"I must follow her rhythm and follow her orders..." he said, "I feast my eyes with her goodness and love."

My heart swells and my eyes weep in gratitude for her and the care he receives at this nursing home.  Thank you God for your blessings...

I asked if he enjoyed his lunch.  "Oh yes, I stuffed myself.." as he laughed...

I laughed too...

"We always laugh when we are together, dear Donna"....

I tell him how glad I was to reach him and how much I love and miss him.

"I love you! The nurses run from one phone to another phone to find me....they know how persistent you are!"  as he laughs again...

He began to sing our song, Bye Bye Blackbird (see here for further explanation of our song...) which is always special and emotional for me...

Wiping my eyes, and putting my voice in check, I tell him I have only the best memories with him.  I tell him he taught me the plays of life by following his examples...

" Thank you so much for telling me...it means so much to me...that is so kind of you..."

I mean it Dad.

He doesn't sound tired.  I can hear Doctor-Doctor in the back ground... I ask Dad to tell her hello from me...

I know he would love to enjoy her company, as she does have other patients...and as soon as she leaves, he will no doubt doze off...

I tell him I will see him soon, in a couple of weeks.  I tell him I have lots of hugs and kisses for him when I come...

"Oh, I am looking forward to those kisses and hugs dear..."

Me too...

Wednesday, September 1, 2010

Sudden Tragedy...Loss Of A Friend...

As some of you may know, Penny Westwood at Penny's Word (which has been deleted) was in a car accident, August 17, 2010. She lived in a small town of New South Wales. She was driving and swerved to avoid a speeding car driving too fast, around a curve and on the wrong side of the road. Her car left the road and slammed into a tree. She was severely injured. The doctors put her into an induced coma. She became conscious, and then had a relapse. Tragically, she died August 26, 2010 in the hospital of a cerebral hemorrhage. Her funeral some time today, in the afternoon. She was only 59 years of age...


Several days ago, I had gone to her blog to check for updates and discovered it had been deleted. It gave me a horrible feeling in the pit of my stomach, but I hoped either her husband Doug, or one of her three teens, may have done it by accident...

I had emailed her Gmail account asking how she was. Today, I received an email from her husband Doug, who shared about her death. When I replied, that email had been deleted as well. I cannot imagine the grief and loss they have to be feeling now...

I read her blog last March. I had read one of her poems and was so touched, I asked if I might have her permission to post it. She graciously allowed me to. At the end of my post today, I will re post her poem.

I had been corresponding with her only five months, but in that short span of time, through her writing and photographs, I felt she was a kind, gentle, loving woman who loved her family, her little town, animals and nature. She was a regular visitor with her comments. I will miss her.

Here is her poem:

Just sayin’.


When in doubt, leap. One needs a little courage to live.
Miracles happen so often they become commonplace.

It’s easier to draw a straight line than to straighten a crooked one.
How come it’s always the narrow path that considers itself superior?


If you paint a black picture, the picture will be black.
Boredom is the price one pays for not enjoying everything.

Getting lost is part of getting there.
There’s something braver than dying for the truth – living without it.


Lessons are learned, not taught.
When your burden gets too heavy, you learn how to carry it.


The little girl riding her bicycle. Never once did she wonder: “Is this worthwhile?”
The sea will wash away our footprints but not the fact we made them.


Experiences for which there are no words get along fine without them.
Reasons are invented, not found.


No river could flow if it had to know its destination first.

~Penny Westlake~

Rest in peace, dear friend...