This blog was formerly dedicated in 2009 to my Dad who died of Alzheimer's in 2013. It's been three years now...and I find myself missing blogging...so I am re-inventing my blog... because, after all, life is about moving through, and going forward...

Thursday, June 10, 2010

Eating, Flirting and Searching For The Big Red Suitcase...

My brother E__ went to visit "Pops", (his name for Dad) at lunch time.  He said Dad gobbled down a bean and cheese burrito, rice, ice cream, milk, coffee, and a big fruit plate.  Dad's appetite is up and running!  After lunch, E__ wheeled Dad out on the patio to enjoy their visit outdoors. My brother is growing a full beard.  He went fishing over Memorial weekend, and decided he liked not shaving.   He recently started his own business, so he can pretty much do whatever he wants.

Dad told him how handsome he was and told him he looked good with the extra tan on his face.  Dad liked his beard.  Dad commented on how he enjoys flirting with the young trainees, who were busy nearby.  Dad winked at E___ and told him, "The ladies are not just flirting with me, if you know what I mean?"   E___ laughed with Dad and winked back at Dad...

E__ was very pleased with how well Dad looked.  All his scabs from the fall are long gone and his skin looks smooth and healthy.  Dad was in good spirits, making perfect sense one minute and then telling my brother how he loves to fly up into the sky and look down on everything...Dad told him, the Christmas trees were too thick and he could not get a good view to the street behind the nursing home... My brother did not correct him, just flowed with Dad's conversation.

Suddenly, Dad looked at my brother and said, " I think it is time for me to get out of here!"

E__ told him, if he left, his Angel, Doctor-Doctor would be so upset and would miss him too much.

Without missing a beat, Dad replied, "Oh, she will go with me, of course!"  My brother had to stifle a laugh, and as seriously as possible, agreed with Dad and went on to change the subject...

Dad began to get drowsy and sleepy, so my brother wheeled him back to his room and helped him into his bed.  E___ gave him a hug and told him, "I love you Pops".

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Mom went to visit Dad after she got off work.  She leaves tomorrow to visit with our oldest brother and his family in Ohio.  Mom will be gone most of the month of June.  When Mom signed in at the front desk, she saw my youngest brother E___'s signature as the last visitor entry.  Mom was excited to see her son..

As soon as Mom greeted Dad, looking around for E__, Dad began to talk non-stop about how proud he was of E__.  He raved on about how handsome, tanned and good he looked.  He told Mom how all the ladies were looking at him.

Mom wheeled Dad down to the alcove so Mom could sit down and relax while they talked.  Dad told her how much "they" (the staff) depend on him (Dad).  He waved his arms like Vanna White, showing her all the paintings on the walls he had selected.  Mom nodded approvingly...

Six trainees walked in the side door near where Mom and Dad were seated, and greeted them.  Dad smiled and asked Mom if she had seen my brother...then asked her if she liked E__'s beard... Mom was confused.  She didn't know E___ had a beard?  Dad looked disgusted and admonished her for not recognizing her own son, walking right past her!  Mom stammered, still wondering if E___ was still here or had he left?

She told Dad, "I guess I am not very observant."  Dad agreed with her.

Dad has no concept of time, so he probably thought since E__ had just left, Mom had just arrived, and she didn't recognize E___ with a beard.... Mom was not sure if E__ had walked in with the group of trainees, and she didn't recognize him or had she passed him in the hallway coming in to see Dad?.....(Must have been comical...but not to Mom.)  She was frazzled from packing and unable to find her big red suitcase...

Dad mumbled softly then would almost yell, making his voice very loud. When Dad used to live at home, he was constantly telling me Mom needed a hearing aid too, so maybe that thought crossed his mind and made him kick up the volume for her. Mom smiled back at him,and noticed Dad had two wrist alarms, one on each wrist! (Talk about diligence and extra caution...LOL)

Dad told her they were celebrating Philippines Independence day at 2pm.  They were roasting a pig, singing songs, and all kinds of good music.  He did not want to miss any of it.

Mom has a lot of packing and things to do (and to continue the hunt for her red suitcase).  She takes the "red eye " flight out tomorrow night at 11pm, so she took Dad back to the lunch room to await the festivities.

6 comments:

Bossy Betty said...

A good afternoon for all despite the circumstances. I am posting an essay on my Father-in-Laws battle with Alzheimer's next week. A baffling and cruel disease....

Mari said...

Your Dad is just a hoot! I love hearing his stories. I bet he has always had a great sense of humor.
The comment about it being time to get out is a good reminder of why he needs the wrist alarm!

Jeanie said...

It sounds like your dad is fully recovered from his fall. Glad to hear they are keeping a good eye on him with two wrist alarms.

Donna B said...

Hi Betty, I will be very interested in reading your post...so give me a head's up, will you please?

It IS baffling and cruel. It is so emotionally draining to watch to watch a loved one fade away, a little every day. It is frightening at first to hear the strange words and some times, with a strange voice.

The best advice I can give is to just love him no matter what and that seems to give you peace and help you stay calm. BIG HUGS to you my dear friend...

Hi Mari...it's ironic. Dad used to be very reserved, very diligent in doing "what is right and proper". He used to be very dignified. He was very reluctant to do anything that might be a "bad example" to his children.

He appreciated something "funny" and would laugh heartily. He did not tell dirty jokes or laugh at them. Now, he is freed from all the social trappings. He has NO FILTER!!!! He says exactly what he thinks with no regard how it sounds or what anyone will think. I find myself enjoying his changing personality...

That corgi :) said...

I think this is the worst thing about dementia (and I know I mentioned this before, I think); you just never know when you are talking with someone suffering from it where they are at in their thought process, past, future, present, imagination, etc. I think your brother does good to go with the flow and just try to enjoy the time with his dad. I hope your mom enjoys her time away in Ohio

betty

Donna B said...

Hi betty: You are so right...it is very difficult, but we are adapting so much better a year down the road....as I say that, I hesitate as there is so much worse ahead of us...