After making some calls, I discovered the nursing home had discontinued Dad from the Zyprexia (for delusions) last September, and no one notified me...nor did they tell me they changed Dad from taking Namenda to Aricept (both are dementia/Alzheimer's medication), and did not notify on that either.
This morning the charge nurse called me to inform me the Psychiatrist had seen Dad and decided to start weening Dad off the Lexapro (for depression). I can understand them wanting to ween Dad off the Lexapro because he has been in such good spirits since last April when they put him on it.... but Mom had told them at the Care Conference she preferred they leave him on all his current medications.
I know Medicare would have issues, and rightly so, if Dad is not displaying any depression or negative behaviors helped by this medication...but as in the past, after a few months, he will be sad, calling Mom to come get him or getting paranoid someone is trying to kidnap him...it is a vicious cycle.
It is so frustrating to always have to remind them I AM THE FIRST CONTACT, but I guess if it is the only major complaint we have, I guess I can deal with it.
I spoke with Dad this morning...he sounded pretty good, a little tired, but was happy to hear from me and he did recognize my voice. He immediately told me he threw up after breakfast, but feels fine now... I asked if he told the nurse and he told me he did, but reassured me he felt fine now... (I called the charge nurse back and asked if Dad had thrown up, but she and his CNA for the day knew nothing about it.)
I have noticed the last couple of times Dad and I have talked, he usually starts off the conversation telling me he threw up... Maybe he is attempting to get my attention...maybe he notices I have not spoken with him as regularly as I was.... I can't explain to him why it is not just a matter of picking up the phone and getting him on the line... For the past several months, it has gotten increasingly difficult to reach him. It is the usual, he is in the shower, the bathroom, the nurses are passing out meds or meals, he is in activities, he is in rehab, or he is asleep....
Dad always asks about my husband....but today he asked about "the rest of the family"...so I began telling him about my daughters and grand kids and what they are all up to....Dad was unusually quiet, not making comments or asking me to repeat what I had just said... so I stopped talking and called to him...
"Dad?"
Silence...
"Dad?"
More silence...
"HELLO!?"
"Yes, I'm here...I just fell asleep on you..."
"OK Dad...do you want me to let you get some shut eye before your lunch?"
"Yes, dear, that is a good idea."
Short but sweet conversation...I miss our longer talks...but then, I miss so much with Dad...
4 comments:
I'm sure your conversations with your dad somehow register with him whether is is fully there for him or not. It is too bad it is so hard for you to reach him, but at least you know they are keeping him busy and giving him good care.
Hi Donna. Quite a sad little post really. It must be very hard for you, and frustrating at times also, I'm sure. Especially when you can't always get to speak to your dad on the phone. Keep smiling my friend. Onwards and upwards!
I read your newer entry first. But this is what I mean. You TREASURE and seem to SAVOR the visits that are funny that you hear about. And this ongoing thing about having trouble getting to him and getting them to call you. MAN, I remember that with my sister, but she was only in rehab for six weeks and hospice for eight.
How I wish we lived close to one another, sweetie. Love you.
Those facilities tell you what you want to hear and they do what they want. My heart goes out to you and your family.
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