This blog was formerly dedicated in 2009 to my Dad who died of Alzheimer's in 2013. It's been three years now...and I find myself missing blogging...so I am re-inventing my blog... because, after all, life is about moving through, and going forward...

Thursday, January 13, 2011

Just Keep Loving People...

I called the nursing home and spoke with one of the nurses I frequently talk with.  I asked how Dad was and she told me he was fine.  I asked how his eye looked and she told me it still looked bad.  She told me Dad was in the dining room waiting for lunch.  She would take the phone to him and bring him out in the hallway so he could speak with me...

As soon as Dad said hello, I could tell by his voice he had a cold.  In fact, he sounded like he had laryngitis like me.  My voice was doing pretty good, but his was going in and out.  He let loose with a few coughs which concerned me.  I asked Dad if he had a cold and he admitted he did, but he was in wonderful spirits and very happy.

He knew who I was immediately, but our conversation was very sporadic and all over the place.  Mainly he told me how happy he was.  How much he loved living there and how much he loved all the pretty ladies who took such great care of him...

"I'm falling in love with all the people here, Dee...I do my best to stay awake for them so I can be a lover, and I usually succeed"...

"I'm so glad to hear that Dad..."

"I have chances all day long to watch these lovely ladies who are so professional and nice...always so happy to see me.  I just love it when they give me a big smile and tell me they love me.  Even the boss man walks in the halls and smiles at me...but he goes through the double doors and I want to go too"...

"I know you love to go through the double doors Dad, but you have to remember to go with someone.  We don't want you to have another bad fall..."

"Oh no, I don't want to fall.  That's good advice Donna.... Oh, the ladies are so cute!  (He laughs) and one even wore high heels this morning!  Oh I just love it so much when I see a lady in high heels...her legs look so beautiful..."

"Oh yeah!  Women's legs do look beautiful in high heels.  You are so observant Dad!"

"(laughs) I am so blessed.  I am waiting to go into the room so we can have happy questions.  That's what I like to do.  Talk about what makes me happy and hear what makes others happy.  We just have to keep loving people..."

"Oh Dad, that is the best advice ever!  You are so right, we all need to love one another more..."

(Making cooing noises) "Oh you should see all the bright and cheery outfits these cuties are wearing. I'm so happy when I see their big, happy smiles.  I'm happy when they're happy and when you're happy... We fall in love when the system is working..."

"You definitely have a great system working Dad"...

"You have to get a certain system going, where we are getting to know one another and learn about all the people... Oh these little ladies love me...". (laughs and tells someone hello)

"Yes they do, yes they do...and so do I!!!"

"You know I just LOVE candy...especially those twisted red vines...the licorice?  I love to chew on it.  It tastes so good."

"Is red your favorite?  Do you like the black too?"

"Oh yes, I love them both, but I love the red licorice....it tastes sooooooo good!"

"I will bring you some next time I come see you..."

Dad launched into a new topic of selling cars.  He finds out the colors each person likes best and then orders it for them.  He told me it did not cost the customer any extra, but it cost thousands and thousands of dollars...

Then he told me how he missed his home.  How well Mom was doing and getting new furniture and fixing up the house....

"I haven't been home in so long.  I miss my home.  I miss going in the garage.  I have not seen it in so long...when I brush my hair, I remember... Today is such a beautiful day.  The mountains have snow on them.  I used to love to ski.  I have skis in the garage...I think they belonged to S_____ (my second to youngest brother)... Maybe the next time you come over we could go to the house and explore..."

When Dad talks about home...it is so difficult.  I swallowed the lump in my throat and told him...

"I know Dad...we used to have good times... together... exploring..., huh?"

When they began to serve lunch, I told Dad I was going to eat lunch too...so he told me he loved me, his love to my husband, and as always, thanked me for calling and talking with him...

As soon as we hung up, I called the nursing station and told her about Dad's cold.  I let her know how concerned I am for pneumonia.  I asked her to call his physician and ask if he could see him tomorrow.  I ask for her to call me later about Dad and she said she would...

I emailed his primary physician and told him about Dad's voice and his cough, asking him to please see him tomorrow.  I also called the eye doctor who will be doing the consult on Dad's eye on the 25th.  I explained about Dad having Alzheimer's and how a previous eye doctor had wanted to do a biopsy on his eye and how Dad freaked and refused to go back...She told me she would put a note in their system  for the doctor not to mention cancer or biopsy or infection in front of Dad.  I ask to have the doctor call me afterward...

It was good hearing how happy and in love he is....but I am very concerned about his cold.  I will follow up with phone calls and more emails tomorrow, if I don't hear anything later on...

8 comments:

Mari said...

Your Dad is such a special guy. I'm glad you are looking out for him.

Jeanie said...

How hard it must be to worry about all the things a cold could lead to for your dad.
It must be so good for you to hear him talk about being happy with all that he has going on,

mickeydee said...

So happy to hear that he is so happy! Such a relief to have such a happy and sweet conversation with him. I hope you feel better soon :)

Thisisme. said...

He does sound happy, Donna, but you are probably right to watch out for that cold, to make sure that it doesn't turn into anything else. It's good that he has a loving daughter like you.

gayle said...

What a wonderful conversation you had with your dad! How in the world do you remember so much?
I know it's so hard when he talks about going home. Sure wish they could find a cure for this. It seems to be happening to more and more people.

Your family is so lucky to have you staying on top of things like you do! I hope your brothers know it!

The Words Crafter said...

Hopefully, it's nothing big. As I read this, I smiled and thought about how cute your dad sounds and how much fun he is. It also broke my heart a little.....

Keeping you in my prayers and hope you have a great weekend.

Katie Gates said...

Hi Donna, I'm so glad you stopped by my blog and so led me to yours. Your father's spirit is amazing! And he holds so much wisdom that he is still able to pass along. "We fall in love when the system is working." Boy, I need that one in needlepoint! I witnessed dementia in a household for years (and subsequently wrote a novel about a woman dealing with her husband's dementia). Like your dad, the man I observed maintained the cheeriest disposition. It was always a joy to see him, though it was painful to witness his decline. I'm signing up to follow and look forward to reading more posts!

Vegas Linda Lou said...

How nice that he sounds so happy. Makes you see how everything is relative. Take care, my friend!