The nursing home called me this morning about making an eye consult appointment for Dad with an opthamologist. I had spoken with Mom on the 26th after my husband and I visited Dad. She was going to call and coordinate with the staff on selecting a good day. She has been so busy with all she has going plus all her volunteer work, she finally spoke with the nurse today. They will schedule a consult Tuesday, January 11th.
We all know Dad will freak if the doctor mentions the words, "cancer" or "biopsy", and refuse treatment. I feel so sad thinking if Dad lost sight in one eye...
Mom's Internet is down again, and we think she might need a new modem. She visited Dad on the 30th. He was in the lunch room. He told her he knew she was coming.
"How did you know I was coming?" Mom asked...
"The boys told me yesterday... Donna and Jerry were here too..."
Dad gets the days and time frames all messed up, so Mom just agreed with him. Lunch was served so Mom sat with him and watched as he ate with gusto...
Afterwards, Mom took him back to his room. Both his room mates were out, so it was quiet. It was way too cold to take him to the patio. Some times Dad just sat and stared, not saying a word and the next he would be talking non stop.
He told her he had put black marker on the foreheads of all the real employees so he could recognize any false impostor employees. He told her he warned them all if they came in drunk, the Marines would be ordered to shoot them.
I am very concerned because Dad has been sounding very paranoid and delusional for the past couple of weeks. I have checked with several of the nurses and there have not been any unusual disturbances which may have upset Dad and the other residents.
I had asked the nurses to monitor Dad, making sure he not near the TV at news time. I know my request is asking a lot with all the other patients they have... I just don't want him to return to his paranoia and delusions and have to go back on the Seraquill... If he has any episodes they will send him back to the mental hospital, and we don't want that to happen!
These are the times I have to keep my faith in God, remember Dad is in God's hands, and we can only do so much... Dad is engulfed in the ravages of this hideous disease and it will eventually claim him...one way or another. We are on borrowed time with Dad. We have been very blessed with so many good days...but I know, I can feel a big storm brewing...
10 comments:
Donna, I pray that your dad will not have to go back into the mental hospital. That would be so upsetting for you all. Let's hope that his 'good' days will continue for some time to come yet.
It's just not fair, is it? I hate that he and your family have to go through this....
I'll be keeping you all in my prayers.
I would be concerned too. It sounds like his dementia is causing more paranoia and delusions. I hope they are monitoring him. Maybe his meds need to be adjusted, so avoid another trip to the mental hospital.
It is so hard to be dealing with a situation that is destined not to have a happy ending. You have been very strong all along, Donna, and will be with whatever comes next.
Ugh
Donna, I spent the last 2 years caring for my mother who had a little dementia. What you describe here is such a magnification of what I witnessed. My heart goes out to you. Mom died 2 days before Thanksgiving. She spent the last 6 months in my home. I thought it might break me, but in the end, it softened me and changed me forever.
I've just scrolled through your blogs and wonder what your spiritual background is. So many things resonate with me.
It sounds like your father is in a safe place. And you and your mom visit him regularly. I hope he has lots more clear days this year.
Oh Donna I'm sorry to hear this! I don't think it's asking to much for them to keep an eye out on what he watches on tv!
Also, have you thought about calling the doctor and if they have to do a biospy then asking them not to use words that would upset your dad. Just a thought.
I'm having to take a deep breathe - gosh I pray your dad's eye will get better. Not fair at all. sandie
Hi Donna!
Thank you for visiting me last month and leaving a sweet comment on my "Starting a Blog 101" post. I've been on "blog holiday" lately but I wanted to come and meet you and tell you how thankful I am that you found me :)
After reading this last post, you struck a nerve as I lost my Dad last year while he was in the nursing home due to dementia (not quite confimed or diagnosed as Alzheimer's). It came on quick and unrelenting, ever so heartbreaking to say the least. A long story short, his doctor put him on Seroquil XR which shortly led to his death. Seroquil is NOT meant for dementia/Alzheimer patients so if your Dad is possibly showing signs of it...even in the least bit...please be aware of this. Do your research and talk to his doctor.
Giving care to our elderly parents is the greatest gift we children can do for them, especially since they've given us such a wonderful life. It is hard and I feel for you...I have totally walked in your shoes.
Much love and peace~
Jodie
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