Good News, Bad News...

Dad's Chaplain friend and former co-worker, who still is a volunteer Chaplain at the hospital, prison and nursing homes, came by yesterday to visit with Dad.  He sent Mom an email telling her how well Dad looked and how happy he is!  He said it is the best he has seen Dad look all year and asked if Dad has gained weight...which he has.

They sat on the patio for over an hour and discussed John Wayne, Nelson Eddy, Jeanette McDonald, Seattle, an Alaskan Cruise, sports, lots of mutual friends and many more things.  He told Mom he really enjoyed himself.

He had needed to take three months off from the Chaplain service to keep his sanity.  He and his wife were remodeling their kitchen, their daughter had gotten married and they also had family from England staying with them.

We were all so pleased to hear of their wonderful visit.  Dad has wonderful friends and it is so good they continue to come and visit him.  I know it means the world to Dad.

I want to call him tomorrow as he is due to have his conference call on Wednesday.  We have been very busy beavers around our home.  We are shredding, cleaning, making Goodwill donations, selling some old furniture with a consignment shop, buying some new pieces, having the carpets and tile cleaned, the grout cleaned and resealed.... and the decluttering continues.

My husband and I have been enjoying going out and about together instead of me on the computer and him in front of the TV... we have been searching for a few new things to give our home a fresh new look since we just celebrated our 10th wedding anniversary!

We celebrated at a wonderful Italian restaurant at Green Valley Ranch called Terra Verde.  Some of you may remember it from Gordon Ramsey's Hell's Kitchen.  Two different winners of the show got head Chef jobs in Vegas, one being Terra Verde.

They serve a delicious complimentary relish plate of tossed peppers, artichoke hearts, black and green olives, cheese and lightly battered zuccini slice chips.  Their bread is an assorted basket of  various breads and bread sticks.  We had soup, ceasar salad (next time we will split one) and split Chicken Picata. 

We could barely waddle away from the table!  My husband had two Lemon Drop martinis and I tried a Raspberry martini made with Belvedere Vodka which was suggested by our food server.  WOW was it yummy!  I am not a big drinker..but this did not even taste like booze.  They use fresh raspberries and I guess the vodka has a citrus in it which tones down the raspberries. 

It was such a nice dinner and a wonderful evening.  We sat over candle light with white linen table cloths and just really enjoyed one another.  We exchanged beautiful cards and called it a night.

Now for the bad news.  Mom is not doing well...in fact my sister and I do not think she is getting better.  She has canceled all her many activities, including church, which she so used to enjoy. We are very concerned for her. 

She was only going out twice a week, to have her hair done and pick up her Jenny Craig food...but going grocery shopping is too much and she needs someone to go for her.  Last week she did not even go to Jenny Craig. 

She feels like her legs are going to go out from under her.  She keeps feeling like there are electric shocks going through her legs.  Sounds like a pinched nerve to me... She really is miserable.  The physical therapy does not seem to be helping...

Today, my sister brought Mom two walkers she had purchased at the thrift store.  One for upstairs, one for down.  We all think Mom should switch rooms with my niece, who lives with Mom, as Mom sleeps upstairs.  Mom is not happy about it because she loves her cross breeze she gets sleeping in the fresh night air.  If she slept downstairs, she would not leave her windows open.  She would not feel safe.

Mom has mentioned to both my sister and I how difficult it is for her to keep up that big house.  She has to hand water because Dad never wanted automatic sprinklers.  He always enjoyed watering and talking with the plants.  The house is just too much.  I hate to think of not having the ol' homestead to go to and visit...but the times, they are a changing...

Mom would probably be extremely relieved and happy in Assisted Living.  She would not have the burden of all the upkeep attached to owning a home, plus she would have scheduled activities she could pick or choose to enjoy and she would have her meals prepared for her and a nice private little room to sleep in...preferably on the 2nd floor...

Dad is in a nursing home and needs 24 hour care.  Mom does not need that... so they would probably be in two different areas... We may have to start searching around as my niece is getting married next summer and will move out of the house.  I would imagine, depending on what we can find for Mom, we may have to sell the house to pay for the assisted living... Medicare or Medi-Cal does not pay for Assisted Living, unless we can find something through HUD.

We found the nicest place in Riverside, CA for my husband's Mom.  It was wonderful!  The food was really tasty.  I used to go and have lunch with her as often as they would allow me to do so.  Lots of fun activities and exercise.  Really a beautiful campus.  I want something like that for our Mom...

Please keep both Mom and Dad in your prayers, as I know so many of you do.  I am hoping for a miracle for Mom...she is so full of life and I hate she is having so much pain.  She does her best to be strong, but pain has been an unwelcome visitor and it has overstayed its welcome with Mom!

Tender Moments...

My sister Holly went to see Dad Saturday.  She found him snoozin' in his wheel chair.  She stood behind him and rubbed his shoulders to wake him.  He came alive with excitement and his face lit up with huge smiles and joyful laughter.  He was so happy to see her!

She took him out on the patio and gave him a manicure.  Dad hates to have his nails too long...besides, he loves the attention and hand massage my sister always gives him...

 Poor Daddy...his fingers are so crooked with arthritis...Bless his big heart....

I have been having my usual difficulties in reaching Dad (in between all the stuff we are doing to the house preparing for more company the next two weekends....) so my sweet sister called me so I could chat with Dad.  She also called Mom so she could chat with Dad.  She also tried our brother in Ohio, but his voice mail came on.  My sister had Dad leave a message for him.  She noticed Dad was getting a bit emotional, so she quickly changed the subject and got him thinking about other things...

She drew Dad's attention to the beautiful fall leaves on the trees in the patio area... Dad loves nature as much as he loves his family, so admiring the colors and the magnificent blue skies set him off on a long rambling discussion on trees, flowers and pleasant out door memories....

My sister could hear the guitar music wafting in from the lunchroom... one of Dad's favorite visitors is a Chaplain who comes and entertains with his singing and guitar playing... Holly wheeled Dad back inside, knowing he would enjoy the music....

Holly stood behind Dad, again massaging his shoulders as the Chaplain strummed his guitar... she looked around the room and felt sad for the other residents who rarely have visitors.  Some looked at her and looked sad...

Being a tender heart, she found herself feeling sad for the lonely ones....Dad seemed to pick up on it somehow, squeezing her hand and he told her lunch would be served shortly, so if she wanted to go, it would be fine with him.  He told her how much he enjoyed the music and all his friends...

Holly hugged him good bye and blew him their traditional kiss from the hallway.  Dad caught it and smiled, waving good bye and throwing her a kiss back...

It's Good to be Home...

Dad called Mom a couple days ago...

"Hello? K_____?"  (Dad called, thinking he had called my brother at Mom's house, but she was out....)

"You need to call my attorney and get him down here.  I am sick and I need him."

Dad hung up.

I called the nursing home and spoke with the charge nurse.  Apparently, Dad had thrown up his morning meds after taking the bigger pills with applesauce.  He only threw up once and was fine at lunch.

I wanted to speak with him, but he was sound asleep...

We arrived home on Monday, along with a big rainstorm, complete with thunder and lightning... Tuesday we re cooperated some more.  Both of us are nursing backaches from riding around in the car so much.

The memorial service was wonderful...

It is good to be home...